Deutsch
Français
Español
Italiano
Português
中文
日本語
Русский
Türkçe
USPS BROKE AS A JOKE
Duration: 0:39
Views: 3
Submitted: 1 hour ago
Submitted by:
Description:
Donald J. Trump’s Fiscal Genius: $1.5 Trillion for Epic Fury Fireworks on Iran, But “Sorry, They’re Broke” When the Mailman Wants His Pension – Because Retirees Don’t Make Great TV for a Spray-Tanned Grifter…
Folks, let me tell you—nobody spends money like Donald J. Trump. Nobody! The best spender! Tremendous spender! The orange con man who bankrupted casinos, a fake university, and half his hotels now plays Santa with other people’s tax dollars. They’re talking a beautiful $1.5 trillion defense budget for 2027—42% bigger than last year, $445 billion more, the highest in modern history. Why? Because those horrible, nasty Iranians were this close to doing bad things. This close! (Tiny hand gesture from the guy whose fingers look like cocktail wieners, folks.)..
So they launched Operation Epic Fury—the most fabulous name, believe me, probably named after one of Trump’s bankrupt casinos—and they’re dropping the biggest, most powerful bombs you’ve ever seen. Billions in the first week alone. Six billion in days. Up to $47 billion by April if they keep going. Almost a billion a day—munitions flying, F-15s getting “oopsie” friendly-fired, carrier groups cruising like Trump’s personal armada of gold-plated ego. “Obliterated!” Trump tweeted from his secure golden toilet. “Completely and totally obliterated—the likes of which the world has never seen!” Peace through strength, baby. Trump’s strength. The greatest strength ever—according to the spray-tanned narcissist who thinks “winning” means lighting up deserts while stiffing American workers.
But now cut to the sad, failing, loser U.S. Postal Service. These poor letter carriers—great people, some of Trump’s best friends deliver his Truth Social printouts (the ones with all caps and misspelled words), by the way—have been trudging through rain, sleet, snow, and Democrat mail for 40 years. They earned their pensions. Fair and square. Yet on April 10, 2026, USPS starts suspending employer contributions to the Federal Employees Retirement System. That’s $200 million every other week—$2.5 billion saved this fiscal year alone—just to keep the lights on. They lost $9 billion in 2025. Might run out of cash by February 2027. Maybe jack stamps to 95 cents. Cut Saturday delivery. Or just default on more obligations like they’ve been doing.
TrumpWorld math at its most brilliant: Unlimited blank checks for blowing up Iranian mountains, but when it’s time to fund the pensions of the guys who deliver your Social Security checks, Viagra coupons, and losing lottery tickets? “Cash crunch! Total disaster! They just don’t have the money right now. Structural problems. Very sad. Maybe privatize the whole thing—make it great again, or whatever.” Classic Trump: the guy who can’t manage his own checkbook suddenly becomes a deficit hawk only when it’s time to screw blue-collar retirees.
Picture the scene at the big beautiful Mar-a-Lago strategy session, where the diet-Coke-swilling bankrupt brags about his “genius”:
Trump (gesturing wildly with a cold Big Mac, ketchup dripping down his chins): “They have the greatest military in the history of the world. Nobody does military like me. They’re spending one-point-five trillion—that’s with a T—to rebuild after Epic Fury and make sure Iran stays obliterated. But the Post Office? Disaster! Those pensions? They’re suspending payments. $200 million every two weeks—gone. The mailmen will understand. They love me. Tremendous support from the postal workers—many of them voted for me, I’m told. (Even though they didn’t.)”..
Advisor (nervously): “Sir, the war’s already burned through $27–28 billion since February, and the Pentagon wants more to restock…”
Trump: “Approved! Make it bigger. Add the Golden Dome. Tell the post office to sell more stamps or work harder. Or cut benefits. Who needs Saturday mail anyway? Amazon can handle it. Just don’t bother me—I’m watching the beautiful explosions on TV. Ratings gold! Covfefe!”
This is the same spray-tanned genius who spent years whining that the Post Office was rigged against him because of Amazon, ballots, or whatever conspiracy fit his tiny ego that day. Now he’s running the show and the fix for their “unsustainable model” is… screw the retirees so he can afford more fireworks and pretend he’s a wartime president. Classic low-energy hypocrisy from the guy whose own businesses filed for bankruptcy six times.
The postal workers aren’t asking for a useless wall, a gold-plated border, or another Trump-branded steak. They’re asking for the retirement they were promised after decades of sorting your junk mail. But no—that money is suddenly tighter than Trump’s skin after a bad Botox session or his spray tan after a long rally. Meanwhile, the defense budget balloons fatter than a Mar-a-Lago buffet on all-you-can-eat night. One-point-five trillion. For wars, weapons, and whatever “peace through strength” means when the strength is mostly trillion-dollar smoke, mirrors, and Trump’s desperate need for strongman photo-ops.
Trump’s selective broke routine is comedy gold from a man who inherited hundreds of millions and still couldn’t stay solvent:
Bombs for Iranians? Unlimited! Print it — AGAIN AND AGAIN! Borrow it — AGAIN AND AGAIN! Tariff it and then REFUND IT AFTER SUPREME COURT VERDICT! Whatever — AGAIN AND AGAIN!
Pensions for American workers who actually delivered for decades? “Sorry, losers! DOGE cuts! Efficiency! They’re broke—go eat cat food while they light up the desert for my TV ratings.”
THI idiot who bankrupted casinos, hotels, and a sham university now bankrupts the postal retirement fund so he can play real-life Risk with other people’s kids and other people’s tax dollars. “They have to take care of one thing: military protection,” he says, while grandma’s arthritic letter carrier wonders why his annuity is suddenly optional because the orange grifter needs more boom-boom for his ego….
Make America Mail Again? Forget it! Make Explosions Expensive and Pensions Fake News Again — AND AGAIN!
Next time your package arrives three weeks late with a passive-aggressive “we tried” sticker, remember: The cash that should’ve gone to the retiree who sorted it is currently exploding somewhere in Iran, because Donald J. Trump—with his ridiculous hair, fake tan, and even faker fiscal principles—has priorities, folks. Beautiful, tremendous, completely backwards priorities from the ultimate con artist.
Meanwhile, Trump will keep those bombs coming for the ratings while he robs his letter carriers (good luck collecting that pension, suckers—Trump’s too busy playing general). And God help fiscal sanity in this administration run by a guy who treats the U.S. Treasury like his personal casino chip stack….
So much for the Myth of FEDERAL G-FAG JOB SECURITY — lol!
You wannuh dead-end job?
USPS is “CERTIFIED” in guarantee that it will be a “REGISTERED” dead fuckin end and “TRACKING” of idiots who are pissing lives away to get another g-fag Pension Con mirrors the Pyramid Scheme called Social Security!
Good luck clockin forty LIFETIME earnings credits, your fake retirement blanket awaits you so retire early and get something or at seventy and get NOTHIN!
Good luck wit’ g-fag PONZI schemes!
Stateless Warrior
Folks, let me tell you—nobody spends money like Donald J. Trump. Nobody! The best spender! Tremendous spender! The orange con man who bankrupted casinos, a fake university, and half his hotels now plays Santa with other people’s tax dollars. They’re talking a beautiful $1.5 trillion defense budget for 2027—42% bigger than last year, $445 billion more, the highest in modern history. Why? Because those horrible, nasty Iranians were this close to doing bad things. This close! (Tiny hand gesture from the guy whose fingers look like cocktail wieners, folks.)..
So they launched Operation Epic Fury—the most fabulous name, believe me, probably named after one of Trump’s bankrupt casinos—and they’re dropping the biggest, most powerful bombs you’ve ever seen. Billions in the first week alone. Six billion in days. Up to $47 billion by April if they keep going. Almost a billion a day—munitions flying, F-15s getting “oopsie” friendly-fired, carrier groups cruising like Trump’s personal armada of gold-plated ego. “Obliterated!” Trump tweeted from his secure golden toilet. “Completely and totally obliterated—the likes of which the world has never seen!” Peace through strength, baby. Trump’s strength. The greatest strength ever—according to the spray-tanned narcissist who thinks “winning” means lighting up deserts while stiffing American workers.
But now cut to the sad, failing, loser U.S. Postal Service. These poor letter carriers—great people, some of Trump’s best friends deliver his Truth Social printouts (the ones with all caps and misspelled words), by the way—have been trudging through rain, sleet, snow, and Democrat mail for 40 years. They earned their pensions. Fair and square. Yet on April 10, 2026, USPS starts suspending employer contributions to the Federal Employees Retirement System. That’s $200 million every other week—$2.5 billion saved this fiscal year alone—just to keep the lights on. They lost $9 billion in 2025. Might run out of cash by February 2027. Maybe jack stamps to 95 cents. Cut Saturday delivery. Or just default on more obligations like they’ve been doing.
TrumpWorld math at its most brilliant: Unlimited blank checks for blowing up Iranian mountains, but when it’s time to fund the pensions of the guys who deliver your Social Security checks, Viagra coupons, and losing lottery tickets? “Cash crunch! Total disaster! They just don’t have the money right now. Structural problems. Very sad. Maybe privatize the whole thing—make it great again, or whatever.” Classic Trump: the guy who can’t manage his own checkbook suddenly becomes a deficit hawk only when it’s time to screw blue-collar retirees.
Picture the scene at the big beautiful Mar-a-Lago strategy session, where the diet-Coke-swilling bankrupt brags about his “genius”:
Trump (gesturing wildly with a cold Big Mac, ketchup dripping down his chins): “They have the greatest military in the history of the world. Nobody does military like me. They’re spending one-point-five trillion—that’s with a T—to rebuild after Epic Fury and make sure Iran stays obliterated. But the Post Office? Disaster! Those pensions? They’re suspending payments. $200 million every two weeks—gone. The mailmen will understand. They love me. Tremendous support from the postal workers—many of them voted for me, I’m told. (Even though they didn’t.)”..
Advisor (nervously): “Sir, the war’s already burned through $27–28 billion since February, and the Pentagon wants more to restock…”
Trump: “Approved! Make it bigger. Add the Golden Dome. Tell the post office to sell more stamps or work harder. Or cut benefits. Who needs Saturday mail anyway? Amazon can handle it. Just don’t bother me—I’m watching the beautiful explosions on TV. Ratings gold! Covfefe!”
This is the same spray-tanned genius who spent years whining that the Post Office was rigged against him because of Amazon, ballots, or whatever conspiracy fit his tiny ego that day. Now he’s running the show and the fix for their “unsustainable model” is… screw the retirees so he can afford more fireworks and pretend he’s a wartime president. Classic low-energy hypocrisy from the guy whose own businesses filed for bankruptcy six times.
The postal workers aren’t asking for a useless wall, a gold-plated border, or another Trump-branded steak. They’re asking for the retirement they were promised after decades of sorting your junk mail. But no—that money is suddenly tighter than Trump’s skin after a bad Botox session or his spray tan after a long rally. Meanwhile, the defense budget balloons fatter than a Mar-a-Lago buffet on all-you-can-eat night. One-point-five trillion. For wars, weapons, and whatever “peace through strength” means when the strength is mostly trillion-dollar smoke, mirrors, and Trump’s desperate need for strongman photo-ops.
Trump’s selective broke routine is comedy gold from a man who inherited hundreds of millions and still couldn’t stay solvent:
Bombs for Iranians? Unlimited! Print it — AGAIN AND AGAIN! Borrow it — AGAIN AND AGAIN! Tariff it and then REFUND IT AFTER SUPREME COURT VERDICT! Whatever — AGAIN AND AGAIN!
Pensions for American workers who actually delivered for decades? “Sorry, losers! DOGE cuts! Efficiency! They’re broke—go eat cat food while they light up the desert for my TV ratings.”
THI idiot who bankrupted casinos, hotels, and a sham university now bankrupts the postal retirement fund so he can play real-life Risk with other people’s kids and other people’s tax dollars. “They have to take care of one thing: military protection,” he says, while grandma’s arthritic letter carrier wonders why his annuity is suddenly optional because the orange grifter needs more boom-boom for his ego….
Make America Mail Again? Forget it! Make Explosions Expensive and Pensions Fake News Again — AND AGAIN!
Next time your package arrives three weeks late with a passive-aggressive “we tried” sticker, remember: The cash that should’ve gone to the retiree who sorted it is currently exploding somewhere in Iran, because Donald J. Trump—with his ridiculous hair, fake tan, and even faker fiscal principles—has priorities, folks. Beautiful, tremendous, completely backwards priorities from the ultimate con artist.
Meanwhile, Trump will keep those bombs coming for the ratings while he robs his letter carriers (good luck collecting that pension, suckers—Trump’s too busy playing general). And God help fiscal sanity in this administration run by a guy who treats the U.S. Treasury like his personal casino chip stack….
So much for the Myth of FEDERAL G-FAG JOB SECURITY — lol!
You wannuh dead-end job?
USPS is “CERTIFIED” in guarantee that it will be a “REGISTERED” dead fuckin end and “TRACKING” of idiots who are pissing lives away to get another g-fag Pension Con mirrors the Pyramid Scheme called Social Security!
Good luck clockin forty LIFETIME earnings credits, your fake retirement blanket awaits you so retire early and get something or at seventy and get NOTHIN!
Good luck wit’ g-fag PONZI schemes!
Stateless Warrior
